Fork in the Road

 Its my birthday week, and it is full of deadlines, commitments and choices.  I am feeling some big decisions coming on. Funny how everything can seem uncomfortable and you try so hard to find a way out, but then a door opens....and fear of the unknown sets in.  Stress is at times comforting, when you know how and when to expect it.  What if what is beyond the door is worse?! 

So how am I handling this you ask....why I'm hibernating of course!  Its 70 degrees in Chicago and I am hibernating.  Perfect really when you think about our lack of winter and all.  I guess a better description would be to say I'm being introspective and reflective.  Also trying to play out every possible scenario in my head before it happens to come up with game plans.

Stay tuned, for and update on which road I take.

Connected

I have spent months dealing with the frustration of a broken, grumpy droid phone. A touch screen that spontaneously turns off or takes you to the wrong destination, and saying you are calling one person and really calling another. And yesterday I got myself an early birthday present of a new I phone. It's so nice to be able to connect with people again!!!! What a relief.
In honor of this development I decided to type this post on the phone! Now that's a touch screen worth having!

Cheers to upgrades that catch me up to the rest of you:)

Back in the zone...

I spent yesterday cleaning and resetting my art studio.  The art studio is in our storage unit...and therefore if not used it becomes a catchall.  The storage area starts to take over the art area and everything gets hidden.  At that point it becomes more work just to get the art studio ready to be used and I become...uninspired....

Not a new issue actually, its just a better metaphor for it.  Typically work takes over and I'm uninspired.  Or dishes take over, or bills, or laundry or day to day life.  Quite depressing really. 

As I was resetting yesterday my perspective started to change a bit.  The act of resetting was creatively inspiring.  I am hoping to hold onto that angle.  Ideally dishes would inspire me to paint.  Work would inspire me to sculpt. Bills would motivate me to build furniture and all would be right with the world.

I have always felt that if you give it breath, you give it life.  So I am going to start typing and talking about things this way moving forward.  In the hopes that breathing life into this inspiration process will keep things going. 

One Thing at a Time....Followed by Desert

There is something about stopping everything electrical for a moment and staring someone in the face to have a focused conversation without distractions. I am attempting to be back in the present moment and to do that your mind can't be in 3 places at once....even if you are superwoman...its just not possible. I am amazed at how clear things become and how much easier they are when you focus on one at a time.

And believe it or not, this can be done in a way that does not change your productivity level. If you have the ability to focus in, you will have more energy and be more efficient with everything. This is the lesson of my weekend...the true test will come during the week, but for now I am enjoying how well it is working.

Stunned

After my last post I just reread some of my older posts.  I was stunned and shocked at some of what I read.  I remembered all of it and remembered writing it...but most amazingly I noted what changed and what is the same.  There  is so much strength, direction, and perspective in those previous posts.  Some are amazingly written (if I do say so myself) and I get a sense of how grounded and still I was.

Since those posts I have gone back to trying to fit everything in a nice little box...Fail!!  I now find myself wondering what that is all about for me?  I will have to think on it a bit.  Deep down I am still a fan of my loose tangled ends that will never be completely tied, and I adore those moments when I am free and following my own list.

But on the surface there is still a desire to be labeled and put on the bookshelf of society as:
successful
happy
in a relationship
stable
etc.

Saturday Morning

Not so Saturday Saturday....
The morning started with a slew of emails from the big job while teaching and finishing training for the little job.  So, this weekend could be called weekcontinued.  But, I did manage to get off to breakfast thanks to Justin and our lack of eggs in the fridge.  And the Michigan game is on in the background...so points for that in my multitasking day!

Now that we are over the AM hurdle of weekcontinued.  I'm attempting to decide if I should be painting, or cleaning or resting next.  I'm optimistic that all 3 can be done at once, but I'm not totally sold that is possible.

With more upcoming travel and holidays, it seems this is the weekend to take a moment and test hibernation a bit, however...I have all these creative ideas running around my brain and I'd like to let them out.

Perhaps that is what Sunday is for?

Long ago and far away....

Was I time when I blogged!  And now I'm back.  Not sure what caused the time off...or what is causing the time back, but I am simply grateful for the clicking of keys.  A lot has happened in the last year.

I wanted to post a bit about perspective today.  I am easily discouraged lately...except in those moments when I am able to step back and look at the big picture.  Perspective is key to understanding.  The front row of a movie theater is a totally different film than the last row of a movie theater. I have to keep reminding myself to get up a move to where I can see everything!

I live with a wonderful man, and am lucky enough to have 2 creative and challenging jobs in a recession. 

I am starting to form my vision of what else to do with myself, and writing is still there.  I'm not sure where, but it keeps resurfacing.  So, in an effort to listen to the little voices..I am typing, and will type again soon!